James 4:5,6

James 4: 5,6 

"Or do you think that the Scripture says in vain, "The Spirit who dwells in us yearns jealously?"  But He gives more grace.  Therefore He says, "God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble."

The text before these versus were discussing how the problems in our lives, especially when it concerns those around and in the church, are usually due to our own selfish ambitions and desires.  We strive for things that are not in agreement with God, who essentially has only two rules: Love God and love your neighbor as yourself.

So when we behave in this way, God's Spirit which is inside everyone sits there watching with a burning passion for us to be His own and only his own.  When we turn to the hobbies, attractions, and activities that He isn't a part of, then His own heart tightens in longing for us.  That relationship He wants to have with us is important to Him.  So despite what you do, if you come before Him humbly then He will gladly help you.  If things are going wrong and you pray to Him about those things that are not right in your life with the attitude of you are right and others are wrong, then you have come to God with a proud heart and He won't give you the grace that you think you are entitled to.

Think how a husband or wife feels when their significant other stays out all evening without ever saying what they are up to.  The one still at home worries for them, is jealous of the time they are losing together, and fears the eventual separation that could occur.  If you are the one staying out, coming home acting like you are all that won't help.  But if you come home showing your worry for them and finding ways to spend time with them, most like the one left behind will have compassion towards you instead of turning away.